Packing/Mama

Hello All!

I'm here with Mama and taking a break from packing (which I've been doing for about... 15 minutes.) Exhausting.

We're leaving for Italy tomorrow! We'll meet up with Papa G there and have a wonderful 5 days exploring before we return to Toulouse and Dad takes home a large suitcase full of my things (thanks pops!) I'm currently in the process and packing said suitcase and it should hopefully make final packing much easier (and lighter.)

So far Mama and I have taken it pretty easy. We've checked out a flea market type thing and walked around town.  We walked by the river and Mama even participated in our weekly pub quiz! She likes the Melting Pot almost as much as we do!

We've tried out a few new restaurants, which have all been pretty yummy. The first night she was here, we went for fondue and got something called Raclette. This is essentially half a wheel of cheese that they stick on your table under a heat lamp. They serve it with baked potatoes and ham. Once the cheese is melty, you tilt it over your plate and scrape the cheese onto your plate using a wooden knife/spoon thing. And as we were told multiple times- you scrape with BOTH hands and you DON'T scoop! It was quite a new experience!

People were supposed to be coming over to check out my bed and desk today, but they're being very blase about actually coming, so we'll see.

Later today Mama is going to meet Christophe and we'll give him a thank you gift for all of his help full of goodies from home, including: Bridgewater Chocolate, maple syrup, honey, beans from the Silo, a Yankee Candle, and of course, a New England Patriots t-shirt.

I'm not sure how much I'll be posting before I get home, but I'll try to give you all an update all about Italy. I'll promise you a post-France post as well, but after that, I'm not quite sure what will become of this blog. I enjoy reading it, but once I'm back in New Milford, it's sure to become much less interesting, that's for sure.

But, for now- Mama G and I are living it up!

PS- Toulouse in the sunshine is absolutely the most incredible place in the world.

Nerves.

I've lived in the US my whole life, so why am I so nervous to be going back? I can't wait to see everyone at home and eat some delicious (aka fatty) food, but I just have this sickening feeling that it isn't going to feel like home. Many different people have told me that it is a bit of a shock re-adjusting to American culture/life and that as hard as the people at home will try, they just won't understand how I'll be feeling, unless they've experienced it themselves. Thankfully, I do have a lot of friends that have studied abroad and who will hopefully be willing to help me through the change.

I am really excited to see my Mama in less than 2 weeks and my Dad will be joining us in Florence, as you know. I'm really looking forward to seeing them and to traveling to a new place. I must admit though, I'm scared for when the trip ends and me and Mama will go back to Toulouse and pack up the apartment and head home. As much as I want to be home to see everyone, I also feel like there's a lead weight in my stomach telling me that I'm not ready to go yet. I feel like I'm not done here, like I haven't accomplished nearly enough to be leaving.

I can't even fathom how I'm going to say goodbye to everyone I've met here. These people understand me in a way that hardly anyone else has ever been able to... and they still want to spend time with me despite it!

I don't even know how to explain why I feel so connected to France. Maybe it's just that it's my first time spending a big chunk of my life away from the US. Maybe I really am just scared of the readjustment. I have changed so much since I've been here and I'm so scared that I'm going to go home and just feel completely lost in my old life.

I feel so selfish writing all of this because I know people at home will be reading it. I do miss you all. I can't wait to see you. I am just scared out of my mind and I don't really know why.

I'm honestly hoping in the back of my mind that I can't find a job this summer so that I can look for ways to come back. And I haven't even left yet.

It just feels like I am going to the US for the summer and should be coming back home to Toulouse afterwards. I know that's not the case and I know it's stupid to even think. Just each day that comes closer to me going home, I was expecting to get more excited, but I'm just feeling farther away.

It's April?!?!!

I don't know where all of the time has gone. I will be home a month from tomorrow. That is absolutely insane! I was laughing to myself thinking about the To Do list I had going when I first arrived, because now it seems I've got an even bigger one to accomplish before I leave!

I need to:

• make an appointment with my banker to stop automatically paying my rent and to figure out how to transfer the rest of the money to my American account since I'll still be getting paid after I leave for a little bit.
• end my phone contract
• take pictures of all of my furniture and post it online- and hopefully get my money back for it.
• keep pestering one of my schools until I get paid for the extra classes I've been teaching.
• keep pestering the Allocations Familiales until I get my caf money.
• go through my clothes and shoes to see what is going to come back with me and what is getting chucked.
• go through everything I've collected as "future teaching material" and see what out of it is actually useful and what is going to get chucked.
• organize all of the things I've bought... and buy more. 
• clean every square inch of the apartment so we get our security deposit back.
• pack for Florence.
• pack a suitcase to bring to Florence for Dad to bring home. (and if you're reading this Dad- please??)

I know there is a ton more, but that's all I can think of right this second. I've got about 274 To Do lists laying in various places reminding me of different things. It'll all get done at some point. 

Then, of course, I get home and immediately have to start applying to teaching jobs. Which reminds me, I need to get a recommendation letter from a teacher here before I leave. 

I've got 2 1/2 weeks of teaching left, which is absolutely crazy. Then, Mommy comes! The first few days will probably be a lot of cleaning, packing, and walking around Toulouse. Then, we fly to Florence and I get to see my Daddy too!! 5 days of traveling around Italy, then another week in Toulouse where I'll need to finish packing, move out of my apartment and into a hotel for the last few days. Hopefully we'll be able to take the train to some cool places near by. Everyone hope for warm weather!

I'm going to apologize in advance because with so little time left, I'm spending very little of it at home, so I don't have as much time to update you all as I'd like. But, you'll all hear from me/see me soon enough either way!!

Spring has sprung!

There are flowers and bugs and fuzzy wuzzies crawling about! I love warm weather and I'm so happy I get to experience it here in Toulouse!

I'm in a fantastic mood, but I don't have time to write a whole post, so I'll leave you this friendly reminder before meeting up with friends in town:



For real though. Number one lesson I've learned here- be you!

One month 'til Mama!

I know I just posted yesterday, but I've got a 2 hour break in between classes, so I figured I'd remind everyone that I GET TO SEE MY MOMMY IN A MONTH!!! I know I saw my parents in January so it's not like it's been 6 months or anything, but I only saw them for 2 days and even if I'd seen them for a week, I'd still be missing them just as much 2 months later. If you can't tell, I love and miss my family very much.

I wasn't really sure what this post was going to be about other than seeing Mama Green soon, but I think I've got an idea now! I've been talking a lot about how sad I am that my time here is ending and everything I'm going to miss, so I'll put an upbeat spin on this one!

What I'm Looking Forward to Most about Coming Home:

• seeing my family everyday

I consider myself to be very close with my family and I can't wait to see them everyday. It's something I took for granted before I left and I'm honestly super excited to spend time with them. I wish I was able to see all of family every day, but the least I can do is appreciate being around those who are close by.

• seeing how freaking big my niece, Kiely, has gotten

Since I live at home with Kiely and see her everyday, I don't see a drastic transformation with her like I do with all of my other nieces and nephews. I've spoken to her on skype and I can already hear how much her language is progressing, but I can't wait to see how much she's grown. Also, her manners and general attitude have become much more grown up, so I'm looking forward to seeing those changes too!

• being home for the summer means summer vacation and seeing the rest of my family

I'm lucky enough to live with my sister, Nicole, still, but my other siblings, Heather and Stephen, both live far away with their families. So I don't get to see them and their munchkins too often. But, I'm hoping that everyone will be able to get together again this summer in Myrtle Beach so we can catch up and I can see how big everyone has gotten. I'll even get to meet my new niece, Kinsley, for the first time! Also, while I'm in Myrtle Beach, I'll get to see Poochi and meet her husband and their little boy (if he'd hurry up and come out already!)

• speaking to Jason without having to use a camera or a keyboard

The two of us have been working really hard to speak often and be there for each other, even though we're far apart. But, I'm so tired of this time difference and saying goodnight via webcam and good morning via email. I want to be able to give each other advice and support in person. Plus, we talk so much that sometimes I trick my brain into thinking he's still 5 minutes away, so it'll be really nice to actually be able to call him up and grab lunch spur of the moment when I get the urge to- as opposed to now, where I just remember that I'm in France and that the Chuck Wagon is not.

• eating at the Chuck Wagon

That last sentence just made me think of their biscuits and sausage gravy and fjsdoyhfôitgoh. That will be one of my first stops, for sure. While we're discussing food, I am also looking forward to greasy pizza (preferably buffalo chicken), green bean casserole, corned beef (since I didn't get any on Sunday), buffalo wings from Slider's, penne a la vodka from Matteo's, a bacon egg and cheese on a hard roll from JoJo's, split pea soup from Windmill, beef stroganoff, and anything from Pancho's and Gringo's.

• seeing my friends

I love my friends here, but I haven't forgotten those at home! Whether it's hanging out with people in New Milford or driving up to New Britain to see friends there, I am so excited to catch up with everyone because, let's face it, I'm pretty shit at keeping in touch. It's a weird time now because everyone is graduating and looking for jobs and moving around and I just don't know who is up to what, so I'm excited to chat and have a good time with everyone.

• driving

I miss driving so much. It's weird because it's not like I was obsessed with driving beforehand, but I have had the urge to drive since the first week I was here. There's no need for me to drive here, but I just miss my car. I hope my family is treating the tortoise okay! I'm probably going to get in and stall within the first 5 seconds, but whatevs.

• working at the golf course

I know it sounds silly, but I always have such a great time with everyone I work with. I miss giving all the golfers a hard time and driving the cart around on a beautiful day. I even miss dodging golf balls and running from over-protective geese. I am even looking forward to grabbing a bagel and coffee before opening the pro shop before sunrise. I don't know if I'll find a teaching job or where I'll be in the next year, but I'm happy to have good old CVCC to enjoy this summer at least.

• getting a large coffee that is actually large

I guess this one doesn't need much of an explanation...

• sleeping in a comfortable bed
• not having to constantly watch for dog crap (and hoping that it is in fact dog crap.)   
• seeing my puppy and kitty!!

I suppose this has gotten a bit out of hand, but I think I've made my point. Even though I am going to miss it here terribly, I clearly have very very much to look forward to when I'm home. And that last word is the main thing I guess. I love Toulouse, but it's not home, and I guess that's what that whole list means to me- home.

Surprise Free Time!

Once again, I must apologize for my lazy blogging recently. I honestly have just been keeping pretty busy and having the best time relaxing and hanging out with my friends. St. Patrick's Day weekend was absolutely crazy and as always, we had a great time at our favorite Irish pub, the Melting Pot. They were having some deals and some fun giveaways throughout the weekend, so we spent a majority of our nights there. (I'll post some pictures when I get home, but I'm still at school right now).

Here are some of my favorites:

I was supposed to have a class right now, but the teacher had to leave suddenly for an emergency and no one told me, so I'm just enjoying a coffee and updating you for the next 20 minutes or so before my own private class thingy.

I can't believe I only have 4 1/2 more weeks of teaching. My Mommy is arriving a month from tomorrow and our trip planning is coming along very nicely! I am really looking forward to seeing everyone at home, but like I said in the last post, I just know how sad I'm going to be at the same time when all of this is over. I can honestly say that I've made friends I'm going to keep in touch with for the rest of my life. I just wish I didn't happen to live an ocean away from all of them. I just can't help it, I love those sarcastic, dry-humored, English babes. At least it gives me more excuses to come to Europe, right? As if I needed any more.

I can honestly say that this experience has made amazing changes in me that are going to be present the rest of my life. I am more confident, self-assured, and happy than I have ever been. I don't think those things will go away when I return home, at least I hope not. I'm ready to be back with my family and friends and everyone I love. I just hope it's not too difficult adjusting to life back in Connecticut. I'm sure I'll make it through. I'm a pretty tough cookie.

And who knows, maybe some day I'll have the chance to spend more time in Europe while sharing the experience with people I love. I don't really know how that would work, but a girl can dream, right?

I need to get going for the next class, but I'll try and remember to add some pictures when I get home. After this little piggy gets her dinner though. It's only 4:30 and my stomach is already growling.

Okay, I'm actually leaving now.

A toute!


PS- I just got back home from teaching my private class. We talked about St. Patrick's Day in the US and we did "mad-libs" about leprechauns and the Blarney Stone, which were a huge success. It got the students laughing, practicing different parts of speech, reading out loud, and comprehending English readings!

PARIS!!

Paris was such a wonderful, wonderful whirlwind. When I first arrived, I must admit that I was completely overwhelmed by the mass amount of things there are to do. I had a whole week there, but the first few days when I was staying in the hostel, I found it really difficult to just get up and go. I wanted to have a plan, but then plans changed, so I'd have to make a new plan, blah blah blah. Thankfully I got my act together by the time I went to stay with my friend! 

I can't even remember everything I did while I was in Paris and it would take forever to go through my whole trip in detail, so here's a brief wrap up!

Museums:

-Musee d'art moderne

-Palais de Tokyo 

-Musee d'erotisme

-Musee de la Musique

-Le Louvre

-Musee d'Orsay

-Musee Rodin

-Centre Pompidou

-Musee de Montmartre

Non-Museum Things:

-Sacree Coeur

-La Butte de Montmarte

-L'Arc de Triomphe

-Le Tour Eiffel

-Le Bastille

-L'Opera Garnier (from the outside)

-Notre Dame

-Le Cafe des Deux Moulins (where they filmed Amelie!)

-La Duree (macarons!)

-L'avenue Champs Elysees

-Le Pont Neuf

-Le Moulin Rouge (from the outside)

Not to mention I got to see two of my friends that I studied with in Nova Scotia years ago! Lots of wine and bread and coffee and metro tickets and running around like a chicken with my head cut off. 

I think some of the most memorable moments happened when I just actually realized where the hell I was. For instance, I was walking up from the metro and as soon as I stepped out the Arc de Triomphe was just right there in front of me. It took my breath away and I just started laughing hysterically. I don't know why, but laughing uncontrollably just seemed to be my go to reaction because it happened when walking up to the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower as well. People around me must have thought I was absolutely insane, but I couldn't help it. I've been studying French since I was 12 and I've seen countless numbers of pictures of these places and I've read about their history and I've thought about visiting them for years and all of a sudden they were right their in front of me. I just kept asking myself over and over again, "Where the fuck are you, Tori?" 

The city itself is stinky and dirty and cloudy and a 12 year old boy pinched my ass, but it's just impossible to look around without seeing incredible architecture and history in every single inch of space surrounding you. 

I did so many things, but I didn't even make a dent in everything that there is to see there. I honestly do think that everyone could find enough things there to keep you interested you're entire visit, no matter what your interests are. I just can't believe how incredibly lucky I am to have the opportunity to be in France and visit Paris and be able to tell stories to my future students about that time when I was walking through Notre Dame or that time I stood under the Eiffel Tower at sunset. I get to tell my future kids that a waiter in Paris made fun of us for ordering the second bottle of wine before we'd finished the first. It's real now. 

Anyways, here's some pictures!

It's really difficult to explain all of the different emotions I was/still am feeling. Classes are starting back up on Monday and there's 7 more weeks of lessons and then it's done. My Mama's coming over and we're going to travel and have an incredible time together exploring. But, after that I'm going home. I have to say goodbye to my friends. I have to say goodbye to France. to Europe. I have to go home and look for a job and start having to take care of financial responsibilities and I am looking forward to so many things about being home. I miss my family and my friends and my Jason and I can't wait to have them all close to me again. It's just really strange to know that this is all going to be over soon. This is without a doubt the best thing I've ever done for myself. I'm so happy to be having each moment and to be making each memory with these crazy people. I just know how incredibly sad I'm going to be when it's over. Yet, I know I'll be happy to be home as well. It's a strange mixture of feelings, but how freaking incredible is it that I'm in the position to even have these thoughts? I'm a lucky lucky girl.